I'm 34, Im tired, how do people handl this?

I,m 34, I'e lost my wonderful kids!, my wife, and every thing that goes with all that,(x-mas mornin, b-days, soccer games) I'm lost! i have a great job managing a ranch, and thats it. i want friends, my kiddos, my life back. how do people deal with this? the ladies think im a sick guy cause i just wanna friend ! im alone here and just cant deal with this. i need human contact, someone to talk to. i realize there are many, many people worse off than me, and i pray for them, but who prays for me? if i ask i am being selfish! im not looking for sympathy just a way out i can deal with. i can be happy in a dumpster as long as i have someone to relate with. god please help me and pleas help those beyond me first. just find me in your time. why is a friend, a true friend soooooo hard to find? that is my question! why?